Theory of existence

Sorry for my long hiatus, my loyal readers (if there are any), just didn't feel the desire to blog. Each day seems a carbon copy of another, activities are fun no doubt, but as I go on I find I have lesser and lesser time for myself and ultimately away from the maddening crowd.
Ever felt this feeling before? You feel lonely even if you're in a middle of a crowded street. People stream pass you, cars honk, shopping malls lights flare, a hundred thousand voices resonate, yet all you want to hide in some corner, where you can live your own life and not worry about others.
I admit sometimes I have these moments. Where I want to run away from the sea of familiar yet unfamiliar faces around me, run away from all my responsibilities, commitments, basically leaving this world. Akin to death I guess. A living ghost.
Today was one of those days.
I dont know why must I be placed in such a situation. Aren't we all friends, working towards a common goal? Sure, our views differ, but at the end of the day we are still friends right?
Maybe I'm living in this utopic world where friends stay together forever and trade old war stories 10 years from now when we come together with our wives and children. Maybe I'm blind to the fact that such a world is impossible.
The worse part was the fact I have to choose sides. How can I? Both are my friends after all, how does one choose between good friends?
Argh, it is unfair.
Now all I'm doing is just running away, something I swore never to do again, ever since those dark sec 1 days.
But now, it seems like it starting again...