Kingdom Hearts

Riku: What are you making me choose now?

DiZ: Will you take the road to light — or the road to darkness?

Riku: Neither. I'm taking the middle road.

DiZ: You mean the twilit road to nightfall?

Riku: No...The road to dawn.

If Tomorrow Never Comes

Sometimes late at night
I lie awake and watch her sleeping
She's lost in peaceful dreams
So I turn out the lights and lay there in the dark
And the thought crosses my mind
If I never wake up in the morning
Would she ever doubt the way I feel
About her in my heart

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

'Cause I've lost loved ones in my life
Who never knew how much I loved them
Now I live with the regret
That my true feelings for them never were revealed
So I made a promise to myself
To say each day how much she means to me
And avoid that circumstance
Where there's no second chance to tell her how I feel

If tomorrow never comes
Will she know how much I loved her
Did I try in every way to show her every day
That she's my only one
And if my time on earth were through
And she must face this world without me
Is the love I gave her in the past
Gonna be enough to last
If tomorrow never comes

So tell that someone that you love
Just what you're thinking of
If tomorrow never comes

Unrequited

Ronan Keating's "If Tommorrow Never Comes" is playing now.
I have always prided myself to be more pragmatic than dogmatic, but on the subject of relationships, I always allow myself an obscene amount of optimism. Maybe because I grew up on an unhealthy diet of lousy channel 8 dramas that the guy can win the girl's heart by his sincerity, and nothing else. He would brave all storms for her while sheltering her from the storm, never let her be in harm's way, and be there for her always.
I don't profess to be an expert on this topic, people who know me know this all too well. But I guess I'm still clinging on to that absurd hope that when the day comes my sincerity would be good enough.
To me, I don't need to hold hands, have PDAs, whisper sweet nothings to each other all the time etc. I just want to be the one holding the umbrella for her when it rains, carrying the heavy stuff for her or taking care of her when she falls ill. Simple ways to show that I care for her; there need not be overt displays of affection.
Now's your cue to guffaw at me at my naiviety.
Still, I'll cling on to this absurd hope.
If my sincerity is not good enough, then i guess, so be it.

Mecurial

The time is slowly ticking away. Soon, the day will come to pass.
Actually I don't know why I am writing here. I used to think I write sense and people read my sense, but sometimes things happend that make no sense whatsoever and it just throws all conventional theories held dear by people who love their world to be nicely ordered out of the window.
And what happens when that day comes to pass? Does one feel lost, as the pillars of your existence come crashing down on you? Or does one look for the few pillars that haven't collapsed and hang on for dear life? Or move on and desperately look for another pillar? Or instead stay put and hang on to that invisible pillar, the one you can't see touch hear taste or feel, but the one you just know it's there?
Someone asked me the eternal question, why am I here on this earth? My answer was that I live for my future wife, my future children, my future and current family. I guess that's good enough for me. A life well spent if i accomplish this. I don't need elaborate theories why I'm here, I'm here, that what matters. All I know is I have one life that can be snuffed out anytime, I want to make the most of it.
Just feeling a bit pensive. So much has happened since the A's ended. I'm officially considered an adult, someone old enough to be trained to defend the country. Somehow I don't feel older, nor do I look older, as someone pointed out during my japan trip. I think it's because I'm kinda afraid of being an adult. Somehow that concept seems almost alien to me. It entails the fact that the only mail you'll receive are bills. But I still have to blaze this trail, which I have and never stopped doing for my 18 years.
Nick and I share the same sentiments. Change is not really something I embrace. But it, along with death and taxes, are a constant in life.
I'm just rambling here. I should learn to let go, accept some things just haven't been and will most likely not go my way for a considerable period of time. Like I said countless times today, I'll just go along doing stupid things before the hurt gets too unbearable and then I quit.
Life is good by the way :)

Wind

Cultivate your hunger before you idealize.
Motivate your anger to make them all realize.
Climbing the mountain, never coming down.
Break into the contents, never falling down.

My knee is still shaking, like I was twelve,
Sneaking out of the classroom, by the back door.
A man railed at me twice though, but I didn't care.
Waiting is wasting for people like me.

Don't try to live so wise.
Don't cry 'cause you're so right.
Don't dry with fakes or fears,
'Cause you will hate yourself in the end.

(Repeats)

You say, "Dreams are dreams.
"I ain't gonna play the fool anymore."
You say, "'Cause I still got my soul."

Take your time, baby, your blood needs slowing down.
Breach your soul to reach yourself before you gloom.
Reflection of fear makes shadows of nothing, shadows of nothing.

You still are blind, if you see a winding road,
'Cause there's always a straight way to the point you see.

Don't try to live so wise.
Don't cry 'cause you're so right.
Don't dry with fakes or fears,
'Cause you will hate yourself in the end.

(Repeats)

Somehow I like the carefree nature of this song... Maybe because I see the meaning of it in my life...

The story so far

Well well, been neglecting this place badly. Sorry to all my loyal readers, few they are i know, life is good now so I find it hard to gather enough motivation to blog.
Just to sum up what has happened over the days, trip to japan was good, albeit not as laden as last year's trip. Retreated to sentosa for a day, shared a nice dinner with a friend, while idling away the rest of the time sleeping, reading the last juror, playing table tennis and engaging in desperate and ultimately futile attempts to get fit.
Guess slowly this place shall wind down. Once tekong consumes me his place shall only have the echoes of the past. I think it may be time for this place to serve its final function, which is to end. Let's see how things go first, and I'll decide whether it'll be the final curtain call for this place.
To all those who were posted to their respective JCs, good luck and have fun. Enjoy your JC life as it'll only last for a while.

Leaving on a Jetplane

All my bags are packed I'm ready to go
I'm standing here outside your door
I hate to wake you up to say goodbye.
But the dawn is breaking it's early morning
The taxi is waiting, he is blowing his horn
Already I'm so lonesome, I could cry

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you wait for me
Hold me like you never let me go

I'm leaving on a jetplane,
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe I hate to go

There is so many times I've let you down
So many times I've played around
I tell you now they don't mean a thing.
Every place I go I think of you
Every song I sing I sing for you.
When I come back I wear your wedding-ring

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you wait for me
Hold me like you never let me go

I'm leaving on a jetplane,
I don't know when I'll be back again
Oh babe I hate to go

Now the time has come to leave you
One more time let me kiss you
Close your eyes, and I'll be on my way
Dream about the days to come
I wont have to leave alone, and I
wont have to say:

So kiss me and smile for me
Tell me that you wait for meHold me like you never let me go

I'm leaving on a jetplane, I don't know when I'll be back again.
I'm leaving on a jetplane, I don't know when I'll be back again.
I'm leaving on a jetplane, I don't know when I'll be back again.

Oh babe I hate to go.

Tequila Sunrise

Well, it ended with a night of much glitz and glamour.
Still a bit sleep deprived, so I may or may not post a blow-by-blow account of what happened, but it is suffice to say I had a good time. Above average food, ok entertainment and great company. Everyone looked so different that I had a hard time recognising a few people.
Took like 97 photos, but shall refrain from posting them here as most of them have me looking like I just botoxed my mouth, and also people can't start funny stories.
The end of A levels so far has been a fun time, what with hiking in the greener areas of mainland Singapore for GTC, spending time with good friends and like playing table tennis with my siblings. AS the pre-Japan trip phase comes to a close, must work towards my post-japan goals now.
And yah, people I'll be gone from 6-13 as I'll be in Japan. Not bringing my phone so you can forget about contacting me.
Till I come back, bye.

True

I won't talk
I won't breathe
I won't move till you finally see
That you belong with me

You might think I don't look
But deep inside in the corner of my mind
I'm attatched to you
mmmm

I'm weak, it's true
Cause I'm afraid to know the answer
Do you want me too?
Cause my heart keeps falling faster

[chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing thats true
So I will not hide
I'ts time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

You don't know what you do
Everytime you walk into the room
I'm afraid to move

I'm weak, it's true
I'm just scared to know the ending
Do you see me too?
Do you even know you met me?

[Chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing thats true
So I will not hide
It's time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

I know when I go
I'll be on my way to you
The way that's true

[chorus]
I've waited all my life to cross this line
To the only thing thats true
So I will not hide
It's time to try anything to be with you
All my life I've waited
This is true

The End



Hi guys, it's all over. Anyway the whirlwind of activities begin tommorrow, so I shall talk less, let this picture do the talking. Probably one of the very last Guys TM outing we'll have, let this photo immortalise our friendship.
P.S Alvin looks very stoned and (hen)don has brown hair.

Incomparable

Wow, what a blast! Came out the concert hall with my ears ringing. Ok so he can't dance to save his life but he can really sing and connect with the adudience. 26 songs in total, most of them my favourites, like jie kou ,an jing, kai bu liao kou and qing tian. Yeah Jay Chou really entertained me last night. No nonsense banter, just song after song. The only elaborate set up was the starting part where he was on the top being lowered down singing yi fu zi ming, then zhi zhan zi shang. But the best parts was when he did the slow songs, the whole stadium would sing along to him and wave their lightsticks in unison.
(Note to self. Next time a big star comes along go sell some lightsticks at an inflated price. That was what one guy was doing and he was doing brisk business.)
I think the finale was quite nice, jay playing the drums while wen lan and nan quan ma ma sang bai se lie heng. Plus him playing his pink piano while singing qing tian and an jing. And i also realise how action he is, but I guess he has earned that right.
That long fringe covering his eyes, the devil may care attitude, reminds me of a certain Singapore Idol contestant. If he wins, he better thank Jay. But i'll settle for the real thing anytime.
Now, excuse me as I attend to a slight matter called econs s....

This is their world now

It has to be some form of amusement to the powers that shape our lives that I'm down with the flu after my exams. Bad comedy.
In any case, i flipped through the latest issue of outlook that came through the mail. In my groggy, clogged nose state, I deliriously looked for my name under the editorial section, then was mildly panicked when i saw the vice-editior's name wasn't mine, before realisation came back that I no longer have any association with RJC, much less outlook.
Flipping the pages filled with pictures from various activities, like inter-fac games and open house, memories of my own indian summer last year came back. It sure was fun then, the J2s of this year had smiles on their faces as they went about doing these fun activities. Now all we get is to be relegated to be solemn faces in the farewell assembly portion.
Well, this is their world now. As it was our world the same time last year. Enjoy it while it lasts.
P.S To all Guys TM, go look at the outlook issue 3, the latest one, page 8 bottom left hand corner. Can you say immortalised?

The End.

Here we are,
Once again.
Same place, same situation.
The outcome may be different,
Yet weirdly the same.
We came,
We met,
We had fun.
Yet somehow we knew all along.
That this day would come to pass,
All our ghosts will come to rest.
The laughter we shared,
The times we cried,
The times we refused to say goodbye.
Wonder if now we can,
Wonder if now we will.
So now the curtain calls,
We all shall run along.
Each to our own destiny,
Each to our own bright future.
Let’s hope,
That this world we shared
Of two short years,
Has enough memories
To bring you back
One day.
Now don’t look back,
Chin up,
Look forward,
Here’s to our collective plains of gold.
May the seeds sown here
Prosper and grow.

The End.
For now.

To all the friends I made in RJC, this was for you. May our collective futures be bright.

Falling leaves

Just a few rushes of blood to the head.
Rui En is just too pretty. I know most people don't think so, but I can't really explain it as well. She's just pretty in my eyes. Same goes for jeanette aw. Ahh crap the presence of these 2 actually helps me tolerate the general campiness of channel 8 shows.
Incredibles was nice. Pixar really knows how to animate greatness. Chock full of cultural influences as well, what with robots out of H.G wells' war of the worlds, the subtle reference to the flash, the underminer spoofing the undertaker. All wrapped up in a nice warm package of a nice happy family ending.
Just 1 more left. Just hang in there will you? May I remember all the quotes I need to wow those econs s markers.

Offbeat

Sorry but I take time off my bio MCQ mugging to say this.
Rui En is damm chio.
There i said it.
Back to mugging.

(Almost) the end

3 papers in one days is no joke. Thankfully it was quite manageable. Econs MCQ was quite harrowing, paper 2 was better as I ultilised my econs s knowledge to answer the questions, although i drew and redrew my graphs a few times. Biotech was surprisingly easy save for the essay qeustion, but I was pleasantly surprised as for once I actually could answer the question at the first try without going in my head "what in (insert deity here)'s name are you writing?". They even asked us to define a drug, plus gave us 2 marks to calculate gradient. In the end I reckon only 7% of the biotech syallabus was tested, so much for the other funny stuff like monoclonal antibodies.
The pseudo-end, but I mustn't be distracted.
I know econs is done and dusted, but I just couldn't help but think about this. As I trawled the malls today, I marvelled at the variety of consumer goods available to consumers today. Designer shoes, necklaces, digital cameras and body lotions etc. It sort of hit me that most people do not really need, as in without them they'll be unable to survive, such items. Yet it would appear that the economies of the developed world is greatly dependent on consumption, domestic or otherwise, and it is consumption of the unnecessary kind. I guess it wouldn't be too wrong to say that the global economy is fueled by the desire for consumer goods. Investment, government expenditure has its ultimate form as consumer goods, further strengthening this arguement.
What perplexed me more was actually why do we demand goods? This is the part that economics (albeit at A level) does not explain well. The statement that men have unlimited wants does not really explain it. What is the root for this "unlimited wants"? Is it genetic, or ingrained by the society we live?
If we were to examine the Law of demand, it states that demand is the willingness and ability to consume a certain good. Fair enough, it tells us that people are able to consume a good, and only consume the good if they decide to do so. But it fails to tell us WHY we want to consume a good? What do we use as a yardstick for consumption? It is ridiculous to think that each consumer conducts a thorough cost benefit analysis to purchase a product.
Finally, why is there a great need to consume? If it is to maximise satisfaction, then there is an implicit assumption that every consumer would be unhappy until he consumes every good he desires, which is almost impossible as men have unlimited wants. And doesn't it contradict the old maxim, that to be happy you must be contended? It would seem that economics show that the ultimate destiny of humankind isn't as far off as hobbes classically remarked, "solitary, poor, nasty, brutish, and short."
Nothing like a little walk down the malls to sitmulate the brain.

He doth bestride this narrow world like a colosuss

You know, the part where I said it'll be over soon?
I lied.
It's a crazy wait. Somehow time is doing its darnest to make me feel as macham as possible. Like mum says, for some papers, you're just ready, straining at the leash to do it and be done with it.
In any case, I'm grateful to a weekend off to whack econs and biotech, especially biotech, which bores me to tears. Special mention goes to medical biotech, quite possibly the most irritating topic I ever studied.
Just some thoughts I would like to share:
1) I think, once again, it is a sad reflection of our society when I walk into the Orchard MRT Popular to look at comics, what grabs my attention instead are the assesement books piled higher than me (no mean feat), a mere 1 month into the holidays. I don't know about you, but really I think any child would rather play than do assesment books. I just find it profoundly sad that we have degenerated to such a society.
2) Having said that, I think this is the best time to be a student. With all the new initiatives, no more "one size fits all" policies, emphasis shifted away from the mugging part, this is a good sign for future students. Still, I can't help feel cheated, hence my cryptic comment to my sister, who is now in primary 5 and is currently on a field trip to australia, "have fun for the lost generation."
3) Once again, I repeat myself. Singaporeans do not know how to vote as they usually expect walkovers.
4) About the bio o level question that was messed up, here's an interesting related story. I heard someone complaining about it over the radio, claiming the question was wrong, so i went online to check with a RI friend. He proceeded to explain to me why the graph was NOT wrong, and gave his answwer according to the incorrect graph. As it turned out, we know the question was wrong. Anyway, my point is that I sort of expected this to happen. Some damm smart guy/girl would try to think out of the world and answer it in the best way they can, when the question is actually wrong.
Just bear with it a bit more. After 22nd I'll probably be pseudo-celebrating already.

He didn't mumble enough

And that's my verdict.
First of all, happy deepavali, especially to my hindu friends, like mogilan and murugan, it sure sucks to have one of your major festivals during the A levels. What a waste of a public holiday.
The maid has gone home for 6 weeks for a good rest. That means 6 weeks of hoping my brothers who have taken over the household chores don't destroy my uniform, eating lunch outside and cleaning up the house and after ourselves. Oh well, it's a good thing for them as I do think they need to take some responsibility in this household.
Biotech is dreary. I somehow found myself stuck at the yoghurt production section for about 3? hours as I went about doing anything but study.
Some thoughts inspired from television. Product placements (cough*7-11 big gulp*cough) are a tad too obvious don't you think so? I really doubt they were actually filled.
And is it me or the show was filled with more commercials than anything? Lousy Mediacock, did you guys seriously think for a minute that you can fool the audience? It felt more like a half hour show, and we had to sit through countless advertisements.
He really didn't mumble enough. The last judge's comments were quite correct. That's not how you sing a jay chou song. You sing it until no one gets what you're singing. Next time try stuffing a bun into your mouth and sing. You'll get the desired effect.
Having said that he's smart as now all the teenage girls who swoon over jay chou, like his characteristic dark brooding and cool image would associate it with him and will definitely garner enough votes.
How to score points: Wish people happy deepavali and selamat hari raya.
I think the government would cancel the show next week due to its gratuitous use of dialects. This flies in the face of government policy! It is unacceptable! It will lead to moral degradation! The very pillars of our prosperous society are being threatened! Our word is gospel so listen to us only! (End sarcasm)
And actually I don't mind if it's cancelled. It'll be one up the a** for Mediacock. Anyway, I like to remind the whole of Singapore, even before mediacock decided to bring in this concept, on 2/8/03, we were the first in Singapore to this concept to Singapore. It was a night of glitz and glamour, and quote from the corny script I can't remember who wrote (I think it was nick) and delivered by ed, "In this pair of disco pants that I am wearing, I can feel static electricity charging up from the stage." It was the night of 01 Idols, and yes we 01 Raffles Scout Group were the first in Singapore to bring you the idol concept. Illegally of course but who gets hung up by such technicalities. Makes you sick right Mediacock? We were there first, and how.
Oh, and may I remind all those with short memories, the one who won, the one who was introduced as "what do you get when you mix mud, water and a little singing talent?", the one who got a flower from 2 guides, the one who mesmerised the female part of the crowd, the one who said "I hoped touched the lives of everyone here. And I hope to always be your bridge, over troubled water!", was ME! Muhahahaha! (End ego trip moment but I really won. I have the video to prove it.)
Lastly, I don't think ren wo ao you can be considered as a idol drama. It's not frivolous enough. I mean, someone actually died! Anyways, watching this episode made me realise that jeanette aw is a good actress. The various close ups of her as she bit her lip fighting back the tears made me just want to reach out and place a reassuring hand on her shoulder and say to her, "Don't cry anymore. Everything will be alright. You can count one me, I'll be by your side for you."
I guess that's an extension of my personality. "Saviour streak", that's what psychologists call it. Or maybe it's all these years being the "da ge". I know some that read this and would snort but at least I know where I'm heading. Simple and naive maybe, someone so nice gets tricked and corrupted in this cynical world far too easily. But hey, some ideals are nice to have, and I guess maybe it's my own defence mechanism, the wool I pull over my own eyes to make me believe in the niceness of this world and save me from being jaded. Whatever the case, I just aspire to be someone whose eulogy that wouldn't sound faked or forced, but sincere.
Ok enough rambling, back to studying....
Now where did I put those food biotech notes...

Selective denial of reality

Well, how's it going for you?
Papers come, papers go. The cycle of anxiety, thinking, relief that it is over before finally that sinking feeling you get when you overhear that your answer deviates from everyone, or you whack your forehead and go "why didn't i think of that?"
Oh well, that's that.
Only 20 more days to go, not that I'm counting. Am just too tired and bored to ponder about life. At least during the O's I was still watching kiddy grade ( I STILL don't know how it ended!) and had something to look forward to.
Err, this time it's ren wo ao you, singapore idol somewhat, (I just like to listen to my mum being an armchair or bedside critic) OC for my weekly dose of american decadent lifestyle goodness. Gave up on football as it gives me more pain than pleasure nowadays.
Oh and John Rogers is writing the script for the Transformers movie. For your info, he wrote the catwoman script. Just hope that was a slight blimp.
Ran out of stuff to say.
Argh.
Study.
Now.

Maths Paper 1

For those who want to analyse what may come out for the pure maths section for paper 2, here's a list thanks to nicholas tsao, who incidentally has his birthday haha...

Question Analysis for Maths Paper 1

1. small angle approximation, estimate root of equation
2. general solution question- sinx
3. Parallelogram deduction followed by deduction of rhombus/ rectangle (not sure)
4. integration by substitution
5. discriminant, inequality
6. linear interpolation, proving a root exists within a range
7. mathematical induction, deduction of integration using proven equation
8. 3d- trigonometry
9. AP-GP, to find number of odd numbers below 1000, and not divisible by 5
10. Functions and applications of integration- area under curve
11. binomial theorem and series
12. complex number- simple expansion and argument calculation
13. partial fractions and integration using result of partial fractions
14. applications of differentiation- stationary points
15. ODE- everything
16. Vectors

Am I not right?

Can someone explain this to me? So are you supposed to end up with someone you like or love? Ambiguous definitions argh...

Difference between the one you like and the one you love:

In front of the person you like, your heart beats faster
But in front of the person you love, you get happy.

In front of the person you love, winter seems like spring.
But in front of the person you like, winter is just beautiful winter.

If you look into the eyes of the one you like, you blush.
But if you look into the eyes of the one you love, you smile.

In front of the person you like, you can't say everything on your mind.
But in front of the person you love, you can.

In front of the person you like, you tend to get shy.
But in front of the person you love, you can show your own self.

You can't look straight into the eyes of the one you like.
But you can always smile and stare into the eyes of the one you love.

But when the one you like is crying, you end up comforting.
When the one you love is crying, you cry with them.

The feeling of like starts from the ear.
But the feeling of love starts from the eye.

So if you stop liking a person you used to like, all you need to do is cover your ears.
But if you try to close your eyes, love turns into a drop of tear and remains in your heart forever

Universe

I don't really know why, but I have fallen in love with this 1997 song by Savage Garden. And this is despite it being one of the tracks I skip when I listen to their first album. Simple, silky vocals of Darren Hayes, great midnight fare for the ears. Questionable lyrics otherwise, this is a good song for the quiet night.
GP was good. Now for the rest.

Well I'd like to take you as I find you
Imagine our clothes are on the floor
Feel my caress so soft and gentle
So delicate, you cry for more

But you know baby
You know baby does it right
And you know baby does it right

Universe inside of your heart
You gotta let me know
So you can be free baby
You wanted it so much
And now that it's over
You don't know what you want

Put time in a capsule
Two minds consensual
Entwined to perfection
If we could ...

Cuddle up close
Lay on my chest now
Listen my heartbeats coming down
If you get tired you close your eyes now
When you wake up I won't be found

Coz I know baby
I know you're the nervous kind
With so much going on in your mind

Universe inside of your heart
You gotta let me know
So you can be free baby
You wanted it so much
And now that it's over
You don't know what you want

But let me tell you that, this time (this time)
I'm gonna make you mine (I won't let you go)
Coz I know that this time (this time)
I'm gonna make sure I look out for me

Coz you know baby
Well you know baby does it right
And you know baby does it right

You will only end up lost in loneliness
And wake up with the words already on your lips

So I'll let you go, baby
So I'll let you go...

Universe inside of your heart
You gotta let me know
So you can be free baby
You wanted it so much
And now that it's over
You don't know what you want

What will be, will be

Although I know I shouldn't be thinking of this now, but since it's late and any desire to study is gone, I would like to write about what I would like to after the A's are done and dusted. It's only a paltry 1 month so I might as well organise everything before it zips past me in a flash. Of course I must not get distracted. Walking a tightrope here...

1) Get new spectacles, and new shoes
2) Meet up with OG, friends etc to say goodbye before I enter the army
3) Clear out all my notes and stuff
4) Find a buyer for my unwanted stuff, ie campbell, test tubes
5) Go GTC
6) Have a fun time during grad nite
7) Possibly enquire about the possibility of taking classes for driving on weekends during army. Or any type of classes for that matter
8) Attend my 1 week attachment to the law firm
9) Holiday with the family in Japan from 6-12
10) Get into shape....

I guess there's more, but I'll add on when I think of them. Good luck for everyone taking the A's!

The mother of all exams

Here they come. For all the 01 people, hope you guys can remember this poem that LaU wrote during the O level period, and afford yourself a laugh to destress.

The hour approaches:
Final paper,British made
Paper 2, A maths it is (or geog MCQ
lah...solli)
Calculators, pens all drawn
Vigililance! for freedom tempts,
Beyond RI gates green
Sea of white, bated breaths
Velocity perhaps?
Questions yet seen?
'Stop work'
Once dreaded, now awaited!
No more! No more!
Invigilators last seen

Conquest! November's glory
Final peak, 4 years wait
Chiobus beckon, 4 years late
Graduation night, alas!
No date!

Ubin sand, glorious sun
Backpacks laden - horseshoe,
Run!

Blood and sweat,
Yunnan bai fen
No sanitation,
Joyful abrasion
Let spirits soar,
Campfire high,
GC no monkey,
Harken, no sighs!

Alas JC comes
Wherever we go
Mugging. Oh what fun!
Mugging's a wonder
Before long, 6 feet under

~~~~~

Island sun, backpacks full
Glorious sand!
Oh ****
It's Tekong
And we all look like Adrian

That someday it would bring me back to you

Thought of the day: Is it the upper blade of the scissors that cuts the paper or is it the lower blade that does so?
Econs s madness at work, yet again.
It's 12 plus, here I am again, a scene reproduced quite frequently, I'll be at my computer terminal, the rest of the family would be asleep, while I'll just engage in online chats or transformer surfing. Maybe I would be playing some music, or I'll have the radio on to listen to the late night shows.
Behind me would be my table, either spread out on top with books, notes, stray papers etc. or clean as I would have packed everything into my bag for the next day.
Just realised that ed is turning 18 on mon, and in 3 months time I'll be turning 19. Man time flies. Another thing I realised is that I would miss school. I would miss being able to take part in insituitionalised education.
Bah listen to me rant. Cue violin music please.
Now that I got the melancholy out of my system, I guess I've nothing to write. How infuriating. Is my life one whole melodrama?
Oh crap the lack of sleep is getting to me when i start asking stupid rhetorical questions. Which are directed to myself. Which I don't intend to answer as I view the fielder of such questions to be intellectually feeble. Wait a minute...
To bring some focus back, IT"S FINALLY HERE! THe mother of all exams, the death star, unicron, galactus, or whatever ultimate doom machine plot device in whatever show you prefer has descended upon us.
So, it is time we light our darkest hour.
Work hard, and you'll reap what you sow.
Question of the day: Why do new cruise liners do not have TV sets?
Ans: Cos xin chuan mei dian si :)

"Sunday Morning" by Maroon 5

Sunday morning rain is falling
Steal some covers share some skin
Clouds are shrouding us in moments unforgettable
You twist to fit the mold that I am in
But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
And I would gladly hit the road get up and go if I knew
That someday it would bring me back to you
That someday it would bring me back to you

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on sunday morning
And I never want to leave

Fingers trace your every outline
Paint a picture with my hands
Back and forth we sway like branches in a storm
Change the weather still together when it ends

That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow on sunday morning
And I never want to leave

But things just get so crazy living life gets hard to do
Sunday morning rain is falling and I?m calling out to you
Singing someday it?ll bring me back to you
Find a way to bring myself home to you

And you may not know
That may be all I need
In darkness she is all I see
Come and rest your bones with me
Driving slow?

Justice has been served



I went one step further in my pre-match rituals this time. Apart from using my Man Utd towel and watching the match downstairs, I decided to do a bit more to show I had faith in my team. I placed a $5 bet on them. The amount may be small, but it was more of a show of faith to my beloved team, the belief they could triumph against the odds.
They did, and how.
All eleven fought, ran and sweated it out, fire burning in their eyes, the hunger to bring down arsenal was so obvious. Caroll was steady behind, even teaching henry a bit about the fine art of possession play; Gary Neville was steady, cynical when necessary; Heinz, the "Argentinean Stuart Pearce" was at his blockbuster best; holding the fort, Rio Ferdinand, the wall which all arsenal's attacks couldn't penertrate, a almost peerless performance, with the assistance of his able deputy Silvestre, who has recovered the confidence of old. The wing masters of Giggs and Ronaldo were subdued somewhat, but they were always a threat; Scholes was in his element, making all those clever balls and being the creative force. Playing Phil Neville was a masterstroke, despite the absence of the Captain Keane, the Younger Neville ran around the pitch like a man possessed, harassing the arsenal players as they dallied on the ball, reminiscent to the last time Man Utd beat arsenal at Old Trafford.
But perhaps the story of the game can be better told by charting the fortunes of the two strikers. Rooney, the man-child of only 19, skipped around the imposing figure of sol campbell and was fell. Penalty. arsenal fans, before crying foul, should cast their minds back to the portsmouth where robert pires did a even more disgusting dive. Up stepped Ruud Van Nistelrooy, who only found the crossbar on the other side the last time the two sides met at Old Trafford. This time he found the wrong side of lehmann's dive, and the look he wore as he raced to the touchline in sheer ecstasy, skidded on his knees and let out a great shout. He wore the look of a man vindicated, the demons past exorcised from him in a single instant. A script only destiny could write.
And perhaps destiny was indeed playing a part, as as arsenal pressed forward, in their desperate search for an equaliser, the substitutes Louis Saha and Alan Smith combined to initiate a quick counter attack, putting paid to any notions that the 4 strikers at Man Utd cannot work together. With a simple square pass, Smith found the 27 million Wayne Rooney, 19 on the very same day, the same player who ended a similar unbeaten run of arsenal's to announce his arrival at the highest level, sweeping it into the net with the simplest of finishes to produce the coup de grande.
Destiny's hand was apparent.
Form is temporary, class is permanent.
And ultimately, justice, has been served.

Question the question.

Econs S mantra. Anyway, there are some issues I need some help in as I can't seem to find the answers to these questions.
1) What do you call the manoverve when you drive at full speed, then do a 180 degree skid turn? Happens a lot of times in movies during car chase scenes. Apparently every american president is supposed to know it to escape pursuers.
2) Who else is taking LNAT on 3/11? What time does it start? It says 6.30 but it could be greenwich meridien time for all we know. Really help. The St Francis Methodist people are just as clueless.
Answers would be appreciated. Thanks!

Maybe it's the champagne talking, but I'll still say it.

Oh man, bio prac is macham. Lilian wong invilgilated my prac. Plus the fact we were counting grains of rice on this lousy sheet of graph paper it felt like RI all over again. The second question was the worst of all, with powerful mark allocationa like 9 freaking marks, plus the controvesy over the axis for the graph. And kidneys are the worst thing to draw. Add the fact I almost had a heart attack when I saw that I had left the report form empty, it was a harrowing prac for me. Don't know whether I expressed what I tried to say properly or not. And I flouted the rule about not using correction fluid.
And to round off the machamness, a bird shit fell into my claypot chicken during lunch. For all the 4D enthusiats, buy 0224, my index number.
Had a comforting rest of the day chatting, playing games, watching OC, snippets of champion and singapore idol. Watching the champion reminds me of the times when I actually enjoyed swimming competively. Still have those medals from cat high times to remind myself of them. Oh well, can't do that anymore, I think my speed is quite hopeless now.
He catches her at the security gate and tells her he knows she loves him and he never meant to hurt her. Anna says she does love him, as a friend, but she knows they don’t have any chemistry. He doesn’t want her to go, but she tearfully tells him she has to, she couldn’t make Newport a home. Then she says maybe one day they’ll be perfect for each other. She hugs him goodbye and walks through security. Seth wants to know what he’ll do without her. Who will play Jenga with him? What will he do without her sage wisdom? A tearful Anna says, “Confidence, Cohen.” As she walks down the terminal Seth bangs on the plastic partition, yelling her name. She turns around, her cheeks wet, her gaze pained. Neither speaks. She simply gives him a small tearful smile and leaves.
And she's gone.
"I'm leaving because I have to."

Exodus '04

Oh man, this is Utada Hikaru at her sultry best. Fans of her previous works will either find her 180 degree change refreshing or get turned off by it. I fall under the former category. This album departs from her usual J-pop fare, plus it's all in English, her first. I must say some of the songs are very sensual, with the lyrics painting various imageries, making some people hot under the collar, or horny to use a more direct term. I highly recommend it, as it is not your usual radio fare, it's a mix of R&B with strong synthesizers in the background. What makes it stand out is of course her voice which is distinctive. Some people may still prefer her previous pop offerings, but I'm fine with the change as I felt she was getting a bit formulaic. This album will appeal to some people only, so I don't expect a mainstream release anytime soon. Anyway, the song below, Exodus '04, is ironically the most popish song of the album, it could even be an English version of "deep river", with the strong Indian beats in the background.

Exodus '04

With you these streets are heaven
Now home feels so foreign
They told me I was mistaken; infatuated
And I was afraid to trust my hunches
Now I am ready

Daddy don't be mad that I'm leaving
Please let me worry about me
Mama don't you worry about me
This is my story

Through mountains high and valleys low
The ocean through the desert snow
We'll say goodbye to the friend we know
This is our exodus '04

Through traffic jams in Tokyo
New music on the radio
We'll say goodbye to the world we know
This is our exodus '04

Landscapes keep changing
His story teaches something
I know I could be mistaken but my heart has spoken
I cannot redirect my feelings
The waves have parted

Daddy don't be mad that I'm leaving
Please let me worry about me
Mama don't you worry about me
This is my story

Through mountains high and valleys low
The ocean through the desert snow
We'll say goodbye to the friend we know
This is our exodus '04

Through traffic jams in Tokyo
New music on the radio
We'll say goodbye to the world we know
This is our exodus '04

I'm listening to a music never-ending
My baby don't you know I'll never let you down
You've opened me to so many different endings
But baby I know that you'll always be around

Through mountains high and valleys low
The ocean through the desert snow
We'll say goodbye to the friend we know
This is our exodus '04

Through traffic jams in Tokyo
New music on the radio
We'll say goodbye to the world we know
This is our exodus '04

Through mountains high and valleys low
The ocean through the desert snow
We'll say goodbye to the friend we know
This is our exodus '04

Through traffic jams in Tokyo
New music on the radio
We'll say goodbye to the world we know
This is our exodus '04

Knife edge

Trip is tentatively on. I can't really feel too optimistic, hopefully a good decision is made with valid reasons.
Nothing else really to write here, prac starts in 5 days.
And united drew again. Argh.

Curtain call

This is the end,
there is no more.
And so another chapter of my life closes.
I didn't cry, nothing in me choked up, nothing really to indicate that the feeling of severing all ties with a place which I called school for the last 2 years. It was more of a confused feeling, not the warm fuzzy feeling as john described, more like that feeling mixed with the relief in knowing it's all over, plus a sudden realisation that 2 years have just zipped past so quickly. Throw in a feeling of introspection as I think back over the 2 years you've got a very confused zhao yang.
It seems just like yesterday when I got that phone call from sally welcoming me to RJC and telling me she was my OGL. I can remember how lost I felt on the first day, how I fretted over stuff really insignificant now. And then things accerlerated at a mad pace, at one point I felt so overwhelmed that I didn't want to go to school at all.
But at the end of it, I think when I look back on these 2 years, I'll have enough happy memories to get me by. JC sure taught me a lot of things in the short 2 years, helped me to be a better person.
I just like to thank all those people I got to know in RJC, my classmates, people in fencing, faction, outlook, assorted ex-RI mates, 22nd o team, my J1 OG Qaeas, and my J2 OG Apsytus and the teachers. And most of all, the Guys, for managing to stick together despite being different classes and pursuing different goals. Cheers to all the new and old friendships.
I guess the occasion got to me somewhat. At times I really wanted this day to come, but now that it has, I wish I could go back and do some things differently. Like not betraying Jimmy in the 2nd week of school, saying things I shouldn't, playing the fool instead of doing things right. All that said and done, I'll cherish every experience, every nugget of wisdom gathered.
Next stop, university or the army. It just hit me that after prom, I'll really never see some people ever again. We'll go our seperate ways, even the Guys would have to split up.
Maybe for all those who knew me, in the future, just remember me as the irreverent idiot, and allow yourself a nice chuckle.
"Tell my tale to those who ask. Tell it truly, the ill deeds, along with the good, may I be judged accordingly. The rest .... is silence."

Just this

I said this to a friend online the other day.
"I would be very happy to be an ordinary person who is extraordinary to his family."
Somehow, it sums up what I want in my life.
To make a difference in areas which matters to me the most.

Down

Went through today feeling very lousy. No motivation to study, got scolded by my CT, friends falling ill etc. A day to forget.
A week to bio prac. Like my teacher said, the A's will be over before you know it, but whether I'll be finished when they're done is another thing. I don't want to live in blinded bliss for 3 months then live in denial for the rest of my life.
Was sec 4 better? I don't know, memory's too foggy.
A classmate asked me the other day, if I could get any car in the world, what would it be? I told her that it'll have to be a red lambogrini, and I'll put a large Autobot insignia on it and call it Sideswipe. She laughed and said it wasn't really me, which I agreed.
In reality, I would rather have a nice gray volvo. I would rather be a strong dependable person, one that people can count on, albeit boring and unadventurous. Something like my dad. I always described him as a volvo, which he is to our family. I guess my desire to want a volvo stemmed from his influence.
I guess, to take the analogy further, there are many people who are volvos, and there are many others who are also swanky sports cars. The sports cars are nice to look at, they get all the initial attention, but there will always be people who prefer the steadiness of the volvo to the speed of a sports car. Or maybe they decide that speed is not their style and prefer steadiness.
No matter how much attention a sports car gets, I would rather stick to being a volvo. I would make a very bad sports car.

Carpe Diem

Why am I still acting as though the A levels do not start in less than a month???

Karrrrannnggg Guuunnnniiii!

Well, I turned out my cupboard, and I found have a stack of CDs I don't want anymore. For a small and negotiable fee you can take them off me. All of them are original, mostly in mint condition (a few scratches here and there, nothing a closed eye can't rectify) Anyone interested just msg me or leave a tag.
And here's the embarassing list. My music tastes then was a bit weird I must admit.
N Sync - No strings attached
backstreet boys - millenium and black and blue
craig david - born to do it
westlife - 1st album, coast to coast (plus poster that I never got rid off), and swear it again single (got conned by jacob in sec 2 for this one, he told me the album was out and it was a steal for 10 bucks.)
boyzone- by request
max and now 4
code red- crimson (won it in the law quiz in sec 2)
So please help increase my coffers and decrease my shelf space. Bidding starts now! :)

Democracy in Singapore is screwed up. Discuss.

How liberating. I ponned the last day of school, after never done so prior to that. Was changed and ready to go, until my inner voice told me this would be the last ever time I get to cut class, and "reason" won in the end.
Won't bore you with details of me studying here, suffice to say it was heartily interspaced with plenty of naps.
I must write this observation down. After seeing the results of the voting in Singapore Idol, I think it would be safe to say that democracy in Singapore needs a lot of work.
First off, addressing the problem of people who can actually sing getting voted off instead of those who pretend to be singing, let's assume a simple model. Out of the Singapore population, assuming that 40% don't vote because they have imperfect information or lack the ability to do so, eg. they don't watch the show at all or they cannot afford to vote. Continuing on, we assume that another 30% are those armchair critics, who watch the show but do not feel compelled to vote, for what reasons I'll touch on later. Then take another 15% who feel motivated enough to vote, but vote in small denominations, let's say less than 5 times. The final 15% are strong and avid voters, who would vote in larger denominations, possibly due to the fact they wish to support their friends/family members/relatives.
Taking this model, if it was an election, it is unconsituitional to form a government where only 30% of the population voted. So the results should not be upheld as they wouldn't form the majority opinion.
In addition, the last 15% that had voted a lot of times are not governed by the most important aspect of democracy, impartiality. They definately have a motive in voting for a certain person, which may and is likely to run counter to the idea of voting for what you think is the best idol.
To make the case more damming, the penultimate 15%, which voted impartially, would be drowned out by the last 15%, thus they would make little impact on standings.
Another point made is that voting ability is affected by affluence as well, so it seems like market forces are at work here, where dollar votes dictate.
Thus, I think there would be enough evidence to conclude that the Singapore Idol voting system is flawed.
Why is it flawed? I offer some insights:
1) Imperfect information, or to be put it bluntly, lack of an enlightened nation that doesn't vote in terms of talent or is unable to recognise talent.
2) Voting on wrong basis. One should only vote for a person if he or she deems the person worthy enough to stay in the competition, not because he or she is good looking/ is your friend/ is your eye candy.
3) Apathy. The portion of the pouplation that may or may not recognise talent do not vote and therefore do not make any difference. This may be due to many reasons, like they don't vote as they assume the next person would, do not feel enough to vote or would rather spend the 50 cents elsewhere.
4) Duplication. One person is entitled to infinite number of votes, so with a lot of thumbwork and money, it is possible for one person to influence the results. Which sickens me to the core.
I believe that Mediacorp should reduce the number of votes per number to 4 only, thus it reduces the likelihood that an interest group can influence the results with their endless texting. Also, the population of Singapore should vote according to the main objective of voting, which is vote in who you deem is worthy to come back, and not due to other reasons. Lastly, it would really really REALLY help if Singaporeans become more enlightened and don't vote irresponsibly. There are no walkovers here.

No comment

I think my titles are lacking in the usual zip and spiffiness, must be due to the quagmire I got myself in.
Less spoken about the results, the better. Hopelessly underachieved. No use fuming about it now, need to grab my subjects by the scuff of the neck and change my failing fortunes.
So many observations of human behaviour in my life, yet cannot find the words to articulate them here in words. Maybe when all this is over, I can sit down and think thoroughly about them.
Till then, I'll make myself scarce here, the books need my attention more than my ego on show here.

Reap what you sow

Well well, the asphalt sure smells good, as I have my nose firmly placed against it for a rather long time. D for chem, kinda expected as papers 1 2 & 3 were disatrous, maths B, which sucks as everyone and his or her mother got an A and I should have joined their ranks if not for horrendous careless mistakes that made me feel sick to the core when I saw them. Econs, I need 13 marks from DRQ to scrape a B, and I'm still feeling sore over the essays. Bio is neither here bad nor good yet, as we haven't got the full paper back yet, but not really keeping my fingers crossed for it. Only silver lining is an A2 for GP, but it says a lot if I do the best for a subject which requires no studying.
Guess the time for the wishy washy studying is over. Time to knuckle down and study hard. It starts on the 21st of october and ends on the 30th of november, and I swear I'm going to do it right for this last time.

Life is waiting

Today was fun. Nice lunch, nice movie, nice issue of transformers, overall nice day.
The terminal is a good movie, thanks to edwin for recommending it. It did capture the human element of the show well, with many a hilarious moments thrown in for measure. I now realise that an airport is a mini city in itself, and the movie put faces on the normally faceless and nameless aiport staff, letting me realise they're just like you and me, normal human beings, with their own lives, desires and dreams.
I find it ironic that i ate sushi for lunch and dinner. Must be one of those days where everything becomes conincidental, like during campfire with the 72 bian hat trick. Dropped one whole packet of california rolls on the floor, one even rolled almost under the piano, had to finish the whole packet myself as "punishment" haha. Even drank quite a lot white wine as well, as it was a sweeter wine and I was feeling a bit reckless thanks to the nice day. Even my sis was nice enough to get me some ice-cream after dinner, even though she had the ulterior motive of wanting to use the whipped cream bottle and chocolate syrup, so much so it was so sweet that i just ate the ice cream and rejected the whipped cream, much to her chagrin.
Friday was my first meeting for quite a long time, and well, it was fun at times, settled quite a number of stuff, shuwei came up with SIGH! sign to GL anyone who talked out of point (i got it like 3? times), only person not to get it was brandon. Had coffee break courtesy of brandon, who only woke up at 2 when jun seng called him . Jolly. The meeting ended quite early at 9, (we expected to be able to get a mid-morning snack at 5 am) we went to J8's cafe cartel and ate dinner. Had a very stale fish and chips for dinner, with free flow of ice water and big hunk of bread to go along with it. The guys laughed at me cutting it up, they rather tear it apart with their hands. Ate till 2230, then don bought a very aptly named shandy called DNA. Took a small swig at it, tasted like sprite mixed with beer, with carbon dioxide bubbles in it. Headed home feeling a tad heady at one point.
Hmm, just realised I'm developing a very cavalier attitude to alcoholic drinks now. My mum must be fearing for the contents in her 5 well-stocked wine cellars.
I guess, the real meaning of "everything but the girl" was evident in the terminal, where the hero doesn't get the girl. Reality? Maybe. But not on my watch.
At the station, before I left for home, I heard the disabled musician sing a very heart rendering version of "leaving on a jetplane". The style i liked most songs sung, chock full of emotion and totally from the heart. They don't do that much nowadays. Having said that, english radio is saturated with rap and punk rock that my mum hankers for the periods when soft love ballads ruled the airwaves, and I do agree with her. Watching singapore idol she started singing along with most of the songs from yesteryear.
Next week will be a tough week. Hope I get the results I deserve. Final lap people, this break has been good, but it's back to business.

Everything but the girl

Ahh yessss, love that smell of freedom. Or is that asphalt I smell instead?
Yup, prelims are done and dusted, 2 and a half weeks of mental torture have finally gone, and I'm glad to report that I didn't suffer from any mysterious anxiety caused stomach/head/backache this time.
Off my head, nothing much of significance really happened, been taking this time to sleep in, read, and ultimately take a breather before the real thing comes along.
Econs s is just an exercise in futility, I was trying to force quotes to make them make sense, which is a very bad thing. Was pondering whether I should come up with a quote myself and attribute it to an economist by the name of John Smith who like Mendel published his work in obscure journals. Was contemplating the name alan smith but sowden would probably have a coronary if he sees the name of Judas reincarnated (to him anyway).
Finished Da Vinci code. I finally join the ranks of the many people who have read this book, and frankly I wonder what's the fuss is about. Sure it was exciting at times, but it got a bit repetive when the main character keeps on having "eureka" moments. He must have had like 7-8 of them in the book. Another thing that bothered me was the sheer length, as most of it was spent doing detective work which didn't really move the story along. I sort of laboured through it, as at times mr brown didn't know what kind of story he wants it to be, a sherlock-holmes type or indiana-jones type.
The first few remarks I heard about this book was its anti-christ theme, and having read how the church has attempted to cover up a lie leads me to wonder a few things. Firstly, how much of the work is real? Places seem real enough, too much intricate detail to be fabricated, it'll be interesting to see what was fact and what was fiction in the book. Another thing which stuck in my mind was Mr Tan, normally a mild-mannered person, had strongly said that the contents of the book was false. It seems that the content did strike a nerve, but I would think it is hardly damaging. Personally, I have nothing against the christian faith, I believe as a whole, it promotes good moral behaviour, but it is undeniable that its past is tainted somewhat. Nevertheless, so what if christianity is based on a lie? Lots of other things are. It just so happens to be the biggest one ever. Anyway, I wouldn't go so far as to pigeon hole every christian to be a bible-thumping evangelist. They come in shapes and sizes.
On a more earthly issue, on the day I was scoring a hat trick of U essays for econs s, wayne rooney, still 18, scores a hat trick of stupendous goals, a left foot lash to the back of the net, a feint and a right footed daisy cutter, before a free kick that brought back memories of a certain mr david beckham. I wished I watched the live match. I would have cried my eyes out with tears of joy and woke up the whole estate with my shouts. 6-2. The last time Man Utd was on the right end of that scoreline was when they shot the magpies down in their own nest, with scholes netting a hattrick too. The only I can complain about was the defence going to sleep twice, letting in 2 goals of the silliest quality. But otherwise, it was a great performance, made even better by a superb player. Think about this. Guys his age (which is also my age) get nervous when asking a girl out or taking an exam, but in front of a stadium 67 000 fans, you score a hat trick with nonchalence, like it was a kick about in the park with your mates. Now, I DARE anyone to write Manchester United off.
Ruud, rooney, ronaldo, roy and rio. The stuff of dreams, ironically in the Theatre of Dreams. Rio holding the fort, roy snapping at the heels of the opposition, giggs and ronaldo giving fullbacks twisted blood, ruud and rooney making defences piss in their pants, plus a very strong squad, I do think we stand a good chance this season. And hopefully it'll be a throwback to those good old days of free-flowing Manchester United football, exciting, incisive and devastating.
Haha, jimmy just asked me about my nick, which is the same as the title of this post. Oh well, at least I have "everything" right? The girl can come later...

Up close and very personal

Wrote this to help my CT write my testimonial, and rather than let it rot in my hard drive, might as well put it out here and let people read. As honest as it gets. Haha maybe after reading you can write me a testimonial on friendster. (*hint I'm not that desperate hint*)

Ng Zhao Yang 2SO3E

1) List 5 adjectives that best describe you.

Easy-going, passionate, meticulous, analytical, affable

2) Strengths and weaknesses

Strengths: Tries to come up with different solutions to problems, will always strive for the best possible solution, but still willing to compromise for the group.
Weaknesses: Lazy at times and tends to suffer no fools. Not very tactful either, says things before thinking.

3) Personal mission statement

"Tell my tale to those who ask, tell it truly, the ill deeds, along with the good, may I be judged accordingly. The rest... is silence."

4) Subjects I like

Economics. Being the subject that is most relevant to my life now, I can relate to it well and use concepts learned in everyday life. Furthermore money is the new religion of the modern economy therefore as a student it helps me have a grasp on what is happening in the world, where money is a very important concern. In addition, the concepts in economics can be challenged and have a human angle, which is similar to my first love law, and it lacks the dryness and absolute-ness of science, where everything is more or less cold hard fact and I just have to accept it.

5) Hobbies

I like reading and writing, but my major writing projects tend to fall through halfway thanks to either writer’s block or lack of time. I also play computer games. Now and then I’ll play football and basketball with friends, or go swimming in my estate’s pool. I rarely watch television save for live televised football matches and played the guitar very rarely. I also have an interest in japanese animation and japanese culture. Also in possession is an almost obsessive liking for the cartoon Transformers, to the point of imaging how cars on the street would look like if they could transform.

6) Challenges over the past 2 years

Personally, I think in my first year I tried to do a lot and found myself with little sleep and a lot of stress at times. I wanted to experience as much as I could as I believed each experience is a learning experience. In the end, I helped out in many areas and aspects, be it in my 4 CCAs or at home. Part of the learning experience was also the independent way of studying required for JC, as you are basically left alone to fend for yourself. Sometimes I would devote all my time to other things and neglect my studies, but in the end I struck a balance and learned to take only as much as I can handle.

7) 3 things I value in life

Family: 2 parents 3 siblings plus various relatives, when everything goes against you at least they’ll be there for you
Friends: No man is an island, we are all social animals and we need friends. Peers, for better or worse, are important in a young person’s life
A (warped) sense of humor: Otherwise, everything would be too dull

8) Course I wish to pursue

I wish to pursue law, specifically biomedical or biotechnological law, as I have interest in both biology and law. It is my belief that these two subjects are the most dynamic subjects today, new laws are being set everyday and we have only started to scratch the surface of biotechnology. I hope that once I graduate I can be the forefront of such changes. In addition, I feel that law suits my outspoken and analytical persona, as I have been actively reading about law ever since I was exposed to it in secondary 2.
I wish to study law, in order of preference, England, Australia then Singapore. I hope to be able to experience the English way of life and by living overseas learn to be independent. Undecided at the moment about the choice of which university, but veering towards the University of Nottingham.

9) CCAs

Fencing:

I started fencing slightly later than the rest, as I had joined the CCA later. However, I soon got the hang of the skills necessary and made great strides quickly. I have a good attendance record, despite having to juggle various other CCAs. I would participate actively in the trainings, working hard under the coaches to learn the skills. Although I was not from a sport CCA before so I was unfamiliar with the concept of a sport CCA, but eventually I got the hang of it.
I attended the various camps and clinics organised. Although I didn’t hold a leadership position in fencing due to commitments in other CCAs, I still actively helped to carry out the activities, even though I did not help in the actual planning process itself. I helped out in a fencing clinic for disadvantaged children, as well as initiating activities in the Fencing camp for the current J1s. I also attended some extra trainings as I was eager to try and improve my skill level.
In competitions, although most of the time we faced up against far superior opposition, we still gave it our best try and gave it all we got.
From my time in fencing, I learned various skills, notably, determination to practise hard to master the techniques; teamwork in order to work well with my teammates in team matches; time management to juggle between studies and CCA; leadership as sometimes I had to lead my friends in stretching and drills. In addition, I enjoyed the camaraderie of my club mates, and I shall take away fond memories of my time in fencing. Given a chance in the future I would want to pursue fencing again.

Events Organised / Participated In
Pesta Sukan Team Championships 2003
Raffles Invitational 2003
Novices Fencing Championships 2004
Singapore Junior Fencing Championships 2004
Schools Invitational Championships 2004 (Div A)
Fencing Singapore International 2004
1 Clinic for welfare youths (9th Sept 2003)
School Clinic Camp for current J2s
Camp for current J1s

Scouting:

Ng Zhao Yang was a member of 01 Raffles Scout Group from 2000 to 2003. He was a volunteer leader with the Group during his first Junior College Year in 2003.

Ng Zhao Yang served in the Group Council of 2003, a council dedicated to the direct administration of the Group’s scouting programme, serving his council position as Venture Vice Chairman. Zhao Yang executed his duties with pride and dedication. He was in charge of the matters involving the Venture Troop consisting of Secondary 4 students, namely their pursuits of the National Youth Achievement Award (NYAA). The ultimate goal was to train them to take on the mantel of Group leadership in the Group Council the following year. His efforts together with Lee Wen Jun Edwin the Venture Chairman were rewarded when the Venture Troop was awarded the Frank Sands Award Silver. Despite having no portfolio in 2004, Zhao Yang still occasionally helps out, drawing upon his experiences to educate the younger Scouts, and has provided advice on matters concerning the new Council before.

Zhao Yang was not confined only to his portfolio, as he played his part in helping the running of the activities of the Scout Unit as well. Despite facing disruptions due to the SARS outbreak, the Group Council organised a diverse range of activities for the Scout Unit, ranging from Scout skills-based sessions held in school to outdoor orienteering exercises and night hikes, ensuring that the Scouts are well equipped to handle life’s challenges, true to the Scout Motto, “Be Prepared”. This ten men team also organised a Community Involvement Project, a Campfire as well as four camps over the course of 2003. Through their efforts, they fostered group spirit and camaraderie. Zhao Yang was instrumental in the successful running of the aforementioned activities.

During his time as the Venture Vice Chairman, Zhao Yang displayed maturity in thought and action to communicate and work well with charges only a year younger than himself. He won their respect and trust with his affable personality, but was tough when important decisions had to be made.

Zhao Yang also actively seeks to improve himself, and his efforts saw fruition as he was awarded with the Venture Scout Standard.

Despite having to juggle other commitments in the form of other co-curricular-activities and his studies in college, he still always found time to attend to his charges’ welfare. A vocal person, he frequently contributes ideas to Group Council discussions, but is also able to know when to put aside personal beliefs to stand by the Council consensus. Zhao Yang is also a situational leader, able to think on his feet and react in a decisive manner to all sorts of problems that may crop up. He carries out his duties in a responsible manner, always meticulous and making sure that everything would run smoothly when executed.

A person who exudes confidence, is passionate about what he does and works determinedly to attain his goals, Zhao Yang has a bright future ahead of him, which would see him being an influential figure in any organisation he goes to eventually, impacting the lives of those he meets.

Raffles Faction:

As a member of Raffles Faction, I played a part in many school based projects, like Open House and Faculty Initiation. In addition, I also helped organise faculty based events, and helped foster friendship and togetherness within the medicine faculty. Although it was hard going at first as we were a relatively new organisation without a clear goal, in the end we managed to find a purpose for ourselves and worked towards achieving it. Through my experiences in Faction, I have learnt that bravado does not get anything done, one must still go through the proper channels in order to get something done. I also learnt that the seemingly impossible task of motivating a large number of incredulous 18 year olds who deem school events as dumb is not that impossible at all. All you need is a thick skin, mega watt smile and sincere words. Not all will sway your way, but those that do, at least that’s worth it.

Rafflesian Outlook:

My interest in writng brought me to Outlook, where I was the vice-chairman. On hindsight, the job required me to do more than what I had expected, I thought all I had to do was to write and write, but I ended up doing interviews, organising layouts for the magazine itself, coordinating between the photography club to take the necessary photos etc. It required my organisational skills to ensure everything ran smoothly. Also with our club’s small size and infrequent meetings, it was hard to pass information along easily and we also had to sort out that problem, which we did using a message group. My time in outlook, although short, was fruitful as I picked up useful skills such as discipline in meeting datelines and working with a small team.

10) Scholarship

Honestly, I hope to get any scholarship that can help me study law in the UK. I am currently looking at the PSC scholarship, but there is a sad lack of scholarships for prospective law students

Soqed Hezi

Strangely enough, my much-maligned and misunderstood alias has never made an appearance on my blog. In the jewish bible it's the name of the Angel of the Sword, i gleaned it off an evangelion fanfiction website, and it has since been mispronounced and massacred by many others. My favourite, "Socketed Hazy" thanks to the Diablo 2 craze in sec 4.
Catching up on beloved sleep nowadays, to the point I'm still alert close to 1 am. Murphy's law at work. Still need to get started for Econs S as well. Why isn't there like "The definative guide to studying for Economics S level" on the market, the physics people have this large black book with green lettering on the front that's like their physics s bible. And the best part is I don't have the slightest idea how to go about studying for it. Jolly. Shall figure it out somehow. Don't want sowden to give me a sneering look when he returns me my paper.
Otherwise, it's a rather relaxing time for me. Watched Kid's central, someone please lend me gundam seed cds, am starting to have an interest in it. My weakeness for giant robots is showing again. In any case, it's still a generic only-pilot-is-a-kid-who-doesn't-want-to-fight anime. Been that done that a long time ago, with eveangelion and a host of other animes. At least the male lead is not as whiny as shinji and he has girls actively after him. And hopefully he doesn't go bezerker and kill everyone eventually.
Hmm LaU asked me a question yesterday, and I never got to answer it. "What really goes on in your mind zhaoyang?" Sometimes I wonder too. Sometimes I'm so sure of myself, so sure of what I'm doing, so in my element that I feel like I'm invincible. Then on other days I feel so swamped by things and elements unknown that I just feel so overwhelmed and frustrated, even if these things wouldn't have bothered another person for one second.
Good enough answer? At least that's what I think.
On a final sidenote, I really miss fencing, on many levels, fitness wise, challenge wise, and company wise. Seeing my foil lying forlornly in a corner of my studyroom collecting dust is a real sad sight to behold.
Good luck to all those taking S papers!

All that one needs

Well well, it's the sign of the changing times that I am actually blogging in the afternoon, instead of studying or sleeping while studying. Yeah, it's the end of the A level prelims, still I got my Econs S paper but that's for later. Much later.
Friday was quite the enjoyable day, with various interesting experiences interspaced with many guys moments. It started with me waking up feeling still a bit zonky, thanks to me staying up late to watch OC. Struggled to school and to stay awake somewhat, in between reading my notes and taking a few cat naps here and there to try and raise my attention levels.
Bio paper 1 was quite easy, but I made one really careless mistake. Argh. Hopefully this paper pushes my Bio grade up. Felt very glad for it to be psuedo over, as the 2 weeks had taken its toll on me. Inexplicable aches and what nots didn't really help me.
Took the train with mogilan to dhoby ghaut, and argued with him whether there is a need to understand the why of everything. A longer elaboration another time. Anyway we got there and saw no one, but js murugan and kenneth came just behind us. The rest joined up later at different times. We got over to paradiz and ate macs for lunch, and that was the start of my money begging to mogilan, as I forgot to top up my wallet before leaving home.
Quote of the lunchhour:
"It's based on a true story right?" Js, refering to the Terminal when everyone else was talking about dodgeball. LaU started to tell us about Valerie, which I am damm convinced is fabian in disguise.
And yes, the whole of yesterday was punctuated with dodgeball jokes, which I could not understand nor appreciate.
Lunch done, we began to LAN. An attempt of battlefield vietnam was aborted soon after, as it was too laggy and boring. We switched to the original battlefield, and kenneth created a server where the bots outnumber us by 10 to 1. But it was really, in truth no kick at all. Plus somehow we didn't really get that many bots. In the end, kenneth decided to go for the jugular and changed the ratio to 100 to 1, and started laughing madly and shouting "Song bo? No kick right? Now sure got kick!" as he pointed at the tactical map, with the numerous blue dots compared to the measly few red dots we had.
Now, that's what I call fun. When you throw your grenade you can kill up to about 7 bots at one go. And they started to try and fly (and crash) the planes again. Finally figured out how to drive the tank properly.
CS was next, and we tried out the new features of 1.6, namely the tactical shield for the CTs. It's amusing to see 4 CTs charging up the italy tunnel with the shields. I shotgunned my way around. This time got less drama, no one headshoted himself with his own grenade, or flash his own teammates. Or maybe I should say I wasn't on fabian team that's why.
3 hours and $5 dollars later, we trekked over to HMV to kill time, saw DC and his gf(?). Anyway we harassed him for a while, before letting him be.
At HMV saw cheryl, went in to talk to her for a while. The rest were playing finger games and trying to contact edwin. Then he did show up, and we flashed lenty of thumb-ups.
In the end we came to a consenssus (after threatening to keep on forming horseshoes around me), to got to suntec for dinner. Along the way, as I was already quite tired due to lack of sleep and my heavy bag of bio stuff I started to whine, the other DC style, much to kenneth's chagrin, who then threatened me with the "umbrella". We slacked at esplanade, under the stern glare of a security guard there. Brandon had to leave for Lingli's birthday party, and sufficiently rested we hit suntec foodcourt for dinner. Following which mogilan told us about this quiet place in suntec where we can just sit and talk cock, and led us to the sky garden.
Well, if you never been there before, DON'T go there unless you're with your other half. I think we unwittingly passed by 9-12 couples making out under the dim lights.
Gosh. We couldn't really find a spot devoid of them, so we just sat on the floor, as far away from them as possible.
My eyes were hurting due to my contacts, and fabian's unfunny jokes were not really helping. On another day I would have laughed but not yesterday. Edwin had joined us for dinner and they were grilling him.
The I saw it. I couldn't really believe it at first, as my eyes were quite blurry, but I asked edwin and mogilan if what I saw was correct, and they confirmed it.
In truth I don't quite know what to make of it. In any case, it's something I found a tad disturbing.
Yeah, maybe towards the end of the day I was not quite myself, but yeah I had fun. Maybe, just maybe, like mogilan said, why waste yourself looking for that one love, when all you need is the company of friends?

The Lazarus Effect

Almost there. 2 more subjects left. Chem was quite harrowing, especially for paper 1, you need to do so much for just 1 measly mark. Maths was interesting as well, as the questions were not the run-of-the-mill type and required me to think a bit further.
I'll be glad once all this is over. But till then, still need to stay focused. At least I get a bit of respite for tommorrow.
Hmmm, wonder what to write here. Oh Silvestre uses his head to good effect and vanquishes the Reds. Rio's return is somewhat like the Lazarus effect, I hope his return would bring back the days when Man United played great football that brought a lot of joy to me.
Overplayed songs on the radio
1) She will be loved
2) My happy ending
3) the reason
I beseech the radio stations to not overplay songs, so much so I am almost sick of she will be loved, which is a beautifu song which is chock-full of meaning. To think that I thought it was the weakest song of the album, going on from Shiver to Tangled immediately.
Media merger = media death. It's back to shitty standards of programming again, it is really a case of how low can they go...
Seems that more people are tagging now. Yeah just tag if you like what i write here, if you don't well we just differ in opinions.
Late at night again. Decided to put off the econs mcqs for now, until tommorrow at least. Realised that, my mind, without work to occupy it, started to wander off to something I thought I had forsaken.
The evils of an idle mind.
Hmm I think I shall post something more interesting next time, after the prelims.

I-don't-want-to-tell-you-but-I'll-tell-you-anyway

Let me tell about a syndrome that is named after the title of this post. That is just a shortened name of the syndrome and does not accurately reflect its nature. The real nature would be "I want to tell you something but I don't want to be so direct and tell you so I'll drop hints to make you ask me or somehow shift the conversation towards it so I can tell you." It is believed to have its origin in the times when women would fan themselves slowly and claim it's hot to show off their diamond ring. This is especially so when it concerns matters of the heart or achievements.
This syndrome is accredited to mr nicholas tsao wen jie who has been very perceptive in pointing it out and coining the term for it.
Confused? Here are some examples to illustrate this syndrome.
1) Jake is with his friends studying. Jake then looks at his phone and announces loudly, "Oh shit, I forgot to call Jessie! I promised to go out with her today! No she'll kill me!" Then he waits for his friends to start questioning him about his relationship with Jessie.
2) OR Jake sighs and says "man later still need to go buy new clothes. Need to to meet Mr Nathan for the awarding of my scholarship." and then waits for his friends to ask about it.
3) OR Jake receives an SMS and laughs happily and audibly, then saying "hey look at this... aiyah never mind" Having aroused his friends curiosity, they would badger him for an explanation.
4) OR suddenly, out of the blue, Jake asks, "hey do you think Jessie is pretty?" Then when his bewildered friend replies, and asks him why did he ask that question, he'll just dismis it with a mysterious nothing, before leading his friend on to probe further and then he'll say.
Got a better idea about it? Actually, this syndrome is a good form of conversation starter, but when it gets to more sensitive subjects eg. wealth or achievements they tend to cause resentment in other people who deem it as an indirect way of showing off. Or people would think you're a chronic attention seeker.
Well, I must confess to having fallen prey to it a few times. But hey, it's relatively harmless, and among friends it's fine, as they won't get wrong ideas of you being cocky. Personally, try not to do this so much, but among friends you guys can have a good laugh about it. Besides, by not doing it, there would no longer be conversation for conversation's sake, and life would be so boring.
Reproduced with permission from nicholas tsao.
Are you guilty of this syndrome?

Cower in the face of danger

After the maths paper on monday, took the train home with yangqi. Boarding it, I noticed a large cardboard box, waist high, written on its side was "korean ginseng tea". And it was stashed near the clear side of the doors, with no obvious owner in sight.
Well, after being well drilled in knowing when to spot danger, I got a bit jittery, thinking it was a bomb. I nervously told yangqi my suspicions, and he pooh-poohed it immediately and loudly.
In the end, I had to endure my over active imaginations as I envisioned a sudden explosion and a large fireball rushing after me while I try to out run it ala insert-any-action-hero-name-here.
Finally, as I heaved a sigh of relief as I left the train, I hazarded one last glimpse at the box. I saw was that the guy sitting closest to it stood up, inspected it for a while, and then indicated that I was crazy by drawing a circle around his temples.
Well, nothing blew up in the end, right?

Occam's Razor

When faced with many solutions to the same problem, choose the simplest one. That's the gist of Occam's razor.
Somehow, as my bored self channel surfed today, I came across this drama serial that had 2 characters telling each other what love actually is. It struck me as their defination was quite simple.
1) If you are scared to talk to the person, yet feel unhappy if he (generic he here) is not around, you'll feel unhappy as well
2) When you're happy, you want to share your happiness with him; when you're sad, you want his shoulder to cry on and for him to comfort you.
3) When you like someone, you want to do things for him to make him happy, as making him happy would make you happy as well
There were others, but they slip my mind. Well, it seems to show that love is actually such a simple thing. Maybe it is just as simple as 2 people who have mutual feelings for each other which are stronger than friendship, who come together, do things together, do things for each other, and admiration will evolve into love, which continues to blossom as they go along life together. A very big maybe then. How's that for simplifying the most complex process or emotion in life into one sentence?
I always say, if life was too easy, the challenge would go out of it. Still, maybe some things are in need of simplification, of keeping other things ceteris paribus while you deal with it. Can we ever do this? The other factors change too fast, and what you do may mess it up more...
Oh well, still a bit affected by the music video for kiss' because I'm a girl. It's about this photographer guy who meets this hairdresser girl and well fall in love, but he leaves a bottle of developing photos liquid uncapped and she accidentally knocks it and it pours into her eyes, blinding her. Blaming himself, he gives his eyes to her as a result loses his career as a photographer. It's very touching, so much so this heartless idiot felt some twang of the heart strings.
What of it? I swear to always cap everything I use from now on. And well, when the right time comes, everything will fall in place.

Pit stop

Well well, prelims have been fun. Yes fun. Strangely enough, I seem to enjoy having my brain teased by the questions. Maths was doable, now I'm afraid it's too doable that my frequent careless msitakes would condemn me. I got a good feeling about econs essay, having spotted oil and budget deficits. Chem err well, got nervous, forgot formulae, basically to quote joshua "never felt so screwed after a paper before". Bio was ok, but was giving answers off my head as I didn't really touch the topics that came out.
And, chem paper 3 and econs paper 3 on the same day, absoultely no joke. Wrote until my hand ached.
Slept at 10 on tuesday night, as I just couldn't take it anymore as I slept at 1230 the previous night mugging for chem and econs. Set the alarm for 5, didn't wake until ah ma woke me up at 6, thus my plans to study early in the morning went out of the window.
At least I get a break for tommorrow, as I don't take feesixs. Will resume with biotech paper on friday.
Went online and looked at universities. Well, to me, all the Uk universities for law are all about the same, so I really have not my idea which one I want to go...
Hmm, recently I realised that I have cultivated for observing cars on my way home, only in a different way. I'll look at a car, and try to imagine how it would transform if it were a transformer. If I see a subaru I would think Smokescreen, a red sportscar Sideswipe, a yellow car with a hood I think Sunstreaker, a beetle I think Bumblebee. Pity no red semi-trucks though. Anyway I remember how esther commented how nice the BMW Z4 looked, I agreed and said it would make a good transformer. New levels of obession haha.
Speaking of which, I must proclaim that there is god on earth, and his name is Don Allen Figueroa. This guy took every transformer featured in their earthen forms, and redesigned them to give them cybertonian forms for the prequel comic. Everyone of them looks good, with homage to their future forms, plus they all transform. In addition, he can draw the transformers the best of all the comics artists.
On a different note, I shall leave with this quote from catch me if you can.
"Why do the (New York) Yankees always win?"
"It's because the opponents get distracted by the pinstripes."
Go figure.

Now what...?

"To see or dream that you are a minister, suggest that you need to be more compassionate and understanding in some situation or relationship. Alternatively, it indicates that you have overstep your boundaries and into another's rights." Courtesy of dreammoods.com.
Ok means I have to retrace what I did on thursday that may fall into this category. Anyway, to all. Let's whack some prelim butt.
And as cheryl/raine has implied, I'm normal. So there.

Philogynist

Now to the normal stuff. Been a crazy week, where I was out of home more than I was in, school surprisingly is rather conducive for study, if you managed to snag a coveted seat in the library. Mugging with christelle is scary. She's so motivated that you get frightened into studying. No wonder she's a top student. Had a few consultation sessions, with ms lui and mr chan, ms lui was swarmed by her numerous students, so I only managed to squeeze a few questions in. Mr chan is really damm good, man if he was our bio teacher from the start maybe my bio wouldn't be so screwed up now. He's so analytical and explains the concepts well. Spent 2 hours with him going through assorted questions from the 2002 set of papers. He even said idiot once when he got led on a merry wild goose chase doing a genetics question. Of what may have been sigh. I bet his J1 classes want him back badly.
Thursday, went to RI with ed nick and jun seng, ate ban mian again, sans egg, washed down with s-11 ice lemon tea. Tried to some essay outlines, but I dieded midway as my contacts hurt damm badly, a combination of the lens being worn out and the mosquito coil smoke getting into my eyes. The power also went out of us in the den, forcing us outside. In the end, we got bored, started talking a bit crap, before breaking for dinner. Bet edwin that lin jun jie is from SAJC (and won as of today!). Had dinner at J8, then jimmy had to leave for his date with a HC girl.... at the tuition centre, leaving ed and I talking cock till about 8, before I went home. 8 as ed wanted to catch singapore idol on the bus.
Friday, woke up late thanks to a another weird dream. Dreamt that PM Lee gave up his post, and Nick of all people was the stand-in Pm for 2 months. Then it was time to vote for the new PM, and weirdly I was voted to be the next PM. Then all I can remember after that was I had to make a speech in 2 hours, during which i was looking for something, which I don't know. In the end, i woke up even before giving any speech, or finding what I was looking for. Uber-weird. Yet it felt damm real at one point. Unbelievable yet real. Another lucid dream.
Got up, played a bit of warcraft, ate lunch and wne tot be a errand boy. Got egg tarts for al as her birthday was yesterday (9/11), and passed the econs compliation to jane, thanks to ed blabbing. Settled down to do a bit of chem, then elft at about 6.
Saturday, ed and adrian came over to study, I picked up dark designs, wildman's art is bad compared to figueroa's. I think I'm too spoiled by Don's great artwork. Anyway adrian left at about 6 while ed and I had dinner at home, before we started to watch, out of curiosity the channel u talent show. Excuse me as I go wash my eyeballs and ears out with dettol again. I can assure you that feels better than watching them (supposed finalists) give listless performance after listless performance. Ok maybe not. Listless is far too kind. More like totally absymal. Gah.
Oh and are you a philogynist? I think I'm an electic one, at times the subjects in question irritate me, but nonetheless they are still engimatic and capricious creatures that are hard to fathom yet strangely appealing. Just my opinion, dont lynch me.
Prelims, here i come. Ready or not.

Tough love

Ok now I'm just feel with frustration and I just have to blast it all out here so bear with me if you hate angry rants.
1) They. Did. It. Again. I couldn't believe my eyes when i saw the bloody @(*#^%(!#&#!( cock up. What happened to the normally calm silvestre? What happened to the normally unflappable howard? Someone sponsor me a trip to manchester now, I think a few very choice words in hokkien would be able to wake all of them.... Gah....
2) Everything the media in Singapore serves up these days...

a)Why is ananconda the no. 1 movie in Singapore???? Ooh man gets eaten by snake wow! Sheesh. Even in America where I always thought had bad taste at least their no.1 movie is Zhang Yimou's Hero. So again, why spend good money or a show that can be considered campy and stupid at best? If one watches that stuff for entertainment, well all I can say if you want to watch snakes watch the Discovery channel and learn something! Besides snakes are more likely to run away from humans as they have highly sensitive ears and are frightened by the vibrations footsteps make. So not only the movie is just plain stupid (no better word describes it) it puts snakes in a bad light.

b)Now back to familiar territory. Mediacock has done it again. After my last rant, where they brought in my big fat fiance or whatever that show is, I thought they couldn't sink any lower. Well, apparently the ground has a false bottom. Mediacock went and got MORE reality shows, which according to PACE, the programming revisory body, are "morally decadent and teach the wrong values" To that effect anyway. Seriously, who wants to watch shows like who wants to marry my dad? or bacholerette 2000? I really cannot stand it anymore. Mediacock is using prime-time slots to spread such drivel to the population! Most reality TV try to push the envelope with crazier and dumber acts, to the point it just gets disgusting. The only reality programmes to have any sort of credibility are amazing race, which I feel is a true advertisment of how global our world is now, and the idols concept, but only if they celebrate true talent. Anything else is just trash. No other intrinstic value but just to accomodate the lowest common denominator of crass and tasteless. All in the name of entertainment.
In this time and age where reality TV threatens to take over any semblance of prime-time, I think shows like friends are badly needed. Humor that is yes crass at times, yet it doesn't come across as being trashy. Pity it ends its run for forever tommorrow. Maybe Mediacock can try to put better shows earlier for once. If they could do it for charmed, why not for Alias, OC (questionable whether it's a good show) Practice, or CSI? CSI especially, CSI is so engaging and informative that it shoudl deserve a prime-time spot, not shelved away into the bewitching hour. The Pratice I agree should be put back a bit, due to the sensitive nature of the topics they deal with, but not till 12, where no one witll watch.
And once again, I say this. If we as a society, allow such tasteless and degrading programming on to our screens, we will find it hard to progress to become a cultured nation. I appeal to Mediacock, please have some moral integrity, find it within that profit maximising soul of yours to do something about the current sorry state of affairs of the shows in Singapore. And please, as a reader, do not contribute to this trend. Do you really enjoy what you are watching? If not, please, i implore you, turn off that TV, call your siblings together, blow the dust off that scrabble board, and play a game. Not only does it sitmulate the mind, it builds family bonds, something the goggle box can never do.
At this point, I would like to say yet again I'm no snob. I understand there is some value, however disgusting it is, to such shows. My point is, these shows are not worth showing on TV, neither are they watching. I hope by saying so much it'll make people understand that such shows should not be watched a lot or at all. Neither can I say what type of shows are better. But all I know is, such shows are definately not worth you wasting your time on.

c)Someone please tell me why is a certain william hung on ou friendly shores? All I know he has made the asian male the biggest joke in the west, embarrased himself and the whole chinese population. And he's here, on our fair island. Well, I blame those who actually brought him here in the first place. One word: profiteering. Cashing in on a freakshow. And to those who, higher being forbid, *shudder* who actually LIKE him apart from his parents, and actually bought his album, well, I'm speechless. Who can actually like him? Sure like any one-trick pony he was interesting for a while but he most definately outlasted his 15 seconds of fame. And now, they made hima judge of a talent contest! Granted the talent contest was half-baked to begin with, but again what does it mean to our society? That a screw-up who cannot dance or sing properly is qualified enough to be a judge in our fair island? Well if that's the case I'm qualified to be the next prime minister. And waht message does it send to our potential talent? That all of you are so screwed-up that even william hung is better than you that's why he's in a judge's seat. And call a spade a spade. He's not some star, he's just a joke that refuses to go away, one that outstays its welcome. Sure he has his "i tried my best and nothing else matters" crap but that nice enduring human characteristic is now gone forever. All I see is a misguided young man with delusions of popularity. William, if you do read this, for the love of any higher being you believe in, the world is laughing AT you, not WITH you. You're the joke.

Ok, feels better to get all that out of my system. Any opinions please use the tagboard.