Helium voiced jailbait, anyone?

Sorry for my laziness, having had the desire to blog much, until it hit me the days that had recently passed are worth remembering, for various reasons. Here's a post to say it all.
Manchester United are Champions! Cheers all around, now for the FA cup final next week. Was desperately trying to find out the Manchester derby score in Hong Kong, only found out it using a internet terminal in a MTR station. And was brushing my teeth in the toilet and heard yangqi telling me chelski only could draw and Man United were Champions!
Watched Spider-Man 3 before I left for Hong Kong, and was quite disappointed. It felt like they were trying to squeeze everything into 2 plus hours and it caused the film to be rather rushed. I hope there's a director's cut DVD somewhere, where they lengthen the film and explain many things that were just left hanging. And poor Venom got shunted so badly.
Was at a secondary school in the west yesterday for work. They were a bunch of sec 2s, with the programme focus on exam and study skills. As I interacted with the class, I found that they're class is very fragmented, with the class monitor that there are as many as 7 cliques! I don't think it was very healthy, so I spent the majority of time talking to the students during the programme, but as a result, I got chided by my Trainer, who is a full timer. The rationale is that we're here to deliver the programme, which is about exam and study skills, not about improving their class spirit.
Which bothered me, a lot more than I'd liked. Normally, although I empathise with the students', especially when they tell me their problems, I can successfully distance myself from them, in a sense wash my hands off them totally. It makes me sound like a callous bastard, but my thinking is that I shouldn't be affected by their problems, otherwise with the number of students I meet, I'd buried under by the burden of their problems. But this class is stuck in my mind. Yesterday, despite knowing that I wasn't there to help improve on their class spirit, the human being within me still wanted to try and help them, even if it is just in a pathetically feeble way; instead of the calculator within me that would decide that the time I have with them is too short and thus not bother.
And they're not the worst class I've been too. Maybe it's because the monitor told me that teachers that don't even teach their class call them stupid. I felt an inexplicable flash of anger when I heard that. And worse still, was she said it in a tone of resignation, and I could guess what she felt. She didn't believe that her class was stupid, but if she were to hear it more, she may just start to believe in it.
She could have been playing games with me for all she cared, but taking it in this context, I must state categorically that I dislike teachers who put their students down, but I can understand why. Teachers are human as well, but they have to remember that their words can mean a lot, even if they think their words mean nothing.
I think it's just me, or either that I have been watching too much GTO. I think for my job, I have displayed the required emotional detachment necessary to survive so far. Still I wonder if that means that I have been discarding my humanity away, a shred at a time.
Had 2 people stand up on me for meals, but expected it as they were both busy people anyway, there was a high chance of it happening. It seems like, save for a few people like myself, many of my peers have seemed to began to enter the 9 to 5 life and are governed by it. Which kind of scares me as I'll enter it soon.
To elaborate on the point, I had supper with a colleague on friday, and she and I were on the opposite ends of the university education spectrum, she a fresh graduate, me a year 0 uni student. She spoke of her interview, and I jokingly reminded her after getting a job the next stage in life is to get married.
She's only 2 years than me, and I'm mucking around, waking up at 11 each day (if I'm not working) and wonder what I'll do for today, while she's out hunting for a job. Gives anyone a perspective on what lies ahead, and it's already mid May. Give it another 4 months and I'll be on that plane to the next stage of my life. And another 3 years it's the mortarboard for me.
Given it's the time for people graduating, I think it's apt to think about my future graduation. Always have a goal in mind, right?
Had to work last thurs, somehow did not sleep well on wed, so was quite tired while working. Went home to crash, but couldn't sleep at all, then had Japanese class, after that I went to be a very good friend for someone. Don't want to describe too much, but suffice to say it involved being a court jester while being very very very tired, having only 2 hours of sleep (at least it was level 4 sleep), and trying to get a cab in the morning for 40 mins to get to work. Surprisingly, I was more alert on friday than on thursday. The wonders of level 4 sleep.
And to the aforementioned friend, you owe me haha. You know who you are.
Intended to sleep early on sun, after watching the trophy presentation, but ended up being a listening ear to a friend from my school days, who was having some problems with her relationship. After 1.5 hours, she thanked me for being a listening ear, and said jokingly of course, although I was nice she won't fall for me as we know each other too well already.
Which is quite true to me. I don't think good friends can be lovers, it's not impossible, but I think it'll be a bit weird. So now all the teasing and name calling and casual banter will be replaced by sweet nothings and hand holding etc is it? It just feels weird to me. But yeah, what do I know about relationships anyway?
Saturday, went to support a friend who was acting in a play. It didn't really turn out the way I thought it would, but at least the rest of the Guys were there so I could count on their company.
Thinking about it now, if I had been in that situation a few years back, I may have just sniggered and made disparaging comments about it. But now, I think I can understand where they come from, despite not agreeing with their ways.
Like what I always tell my students, and what I told those students on monday, I don't care about your teachers, I don't care about other people, I don't care about anything else, I only care about what's inside a person. I believe in what a person can do, what he or she is capable of, and to quote FF12, "to put the reins of history in Man's hands again". To be responsible for their own successes and screw-ups.
Perhaps I'm too idealistic. Even I have trouble taking things by the scruff of the neck and making things happen. But perhaps all we need to know is that, we all CAN. When you want something badly enough, you'll make it happen.
For a final note, to that class I took on mon, I highly doubt you'll read this, but let this be my release. I hope you overcome your problems and become a great class and work hard.
Ok done.
Purged myself of guilt.