Turn left, turn right

Turn left, turn right.
You go my way, I go mine.
I may want to take the same turn with you.
But I don't know whether you will let me.
I don't know whether I have the courage to do so.
I don't know what lies ahead after that turn.
What if we turn away from each other, and never see each other again?
That very thought makes me cold all over.
Maybe I'm happy to be friends with you now.
Maybe someone else more worthy of you will take that path with you.
Maybe I am just destined to take a different road from you.
You are far too good for someone like me.
You always were independent, you don't need anyone.
And if you wish to take that road with him, go ahead.
At least I know you are safe in the hands of my best friend.
Turn left, turn right.
A lingering glance at your path.
Then a determined effort to look away.
One step, followed by another painful one.
Your silhouette gradually disappears.
I walk away, away from you, in the arms of my best friend.
Away from your happy ending.
Away from the emptiness I feel.
To that cold apartment of mine.
To my endless piles of work.
Back to those faceless four walls.
A wry smile.
Why would you want to walk a path with a loser?
I don't blame you.
I guess this is what I should be contended with.
The empty feeling of solitude.

Random bout of insanity.